Man Refuses Marriage After 10 Years Over Girlfriend’s Money Habits

A 29-year-old man has sparked debate online after admitting he doesn’t want to legally marry his girlfriend of 10 years due to her questionable financial habits.

The story was shared in a Reddit post titled “Am I the A—— for not wanting to legally marry my GF of 10 years because she is bad with money?” In the post, the man explained that although he loves his 28-year-old partner and wants to start a family with her, their differing views on money are making him reconsider marriage.

Financial Strain in the Relationship

The man, currently pursuing a Ph.D. program out of state, says he is burdened with significant student loan debt and won’t begin earning an income for at least four more years. His girlfriend, by contrast, earns around $60,000 a year while living with her parents, meaning her only expense is food.

Despite this, he says she expects him to cover the costs of their outings whenever he visits. According to him, dinners and dates often cost between $500 to $1,000 per trip. When he told her he couldn’t keep paying for everything, she became upset and accused him of not prioritizing her.

The man revealed he would be open to a religious marriage ceremony but doesn’t want to legally tie himself to someone with what he views as poor financial sense.

“It just seems like a dumb choice to financially bind myself to someone [who] acts like they have no financial sense,” he wrote.

Reactions from Commenters

The post quickly gained traction, with most Reddit users siding with the man. Many suggested that he reconsider the relationship altogether.

• “I’m a woman, and I would run very far away from this woman. Save yourself a divorce,” one commenter said.
• Another added, “A good relationship should be a partnership where both people bring something to the table. She’s making this transactional. A good partner would suggest cheaper dates or splitting costs.”
• Some accused the girlfriend of being a “gold digger,” while others argued that the man was wasting her time if he didn’t see a real future together.

As one user summarized: “It’s not fair to keep her around if you don’t see marriage in the future. You’re wasting both of your prime dating years. Cut bait and find someone who aligns with your financial values.”